Money, money, money MONEY!

Asshole ex-landlord finally paid me my money after throwing some bullshit my way on why it took so long. Oh yeah! Wait until I pepper my former residence with propaganda spouting off against you and your untrustworthy ways. So there! LOL. That was weak and I am just kidding; despite my anger I probably won't get even b/c I am not like that.. too nice, I am. So today is Thursday night and my 1st large event at my house. I am sort of excited in a train-rushing-toward-me, shit-my-pants way. Not scared of people coming so much, more because I am afraid people won't have fun. I always want people to have fun and eat well and I am worried that for some reason that won't happen. I already made one Cabernet-paired food, a dip with feta, cream cheese, mint, and cukes, and that crap was salty as hell. What if all the other shit I make tastes like crap, what if I don't have enough chairs, what if Bullet( my foster dog that I have discussed previously) somehow escapes my bedroom and jumps all over my guests, knocking one down on his path of destruction??? Oh wait, this party is a wine club event where every one brings a bottle and we blind taste test it. Oh and 17 people are expected to show. 17 bottles of wine... mmmhhh.... yeah, I probably have nothing much to worry about. Oh and in my head about just sounded like ah-boat, pronounced the Canadian way. What the fuck is that ahhh-boat??? Have a pleasant Thursday!!

Rainbow Bill

Rainbow Bill

I bet this dude is a baller

Valentines

So Valentines Day is coming up. Did you know that?? What with the stores being decorated since Jan 2nd, 2010 and all the stupid Kay Jeweler and Hallmark ads that have been flashing on TV every 10 minutes- I'm sure you didn't notice. This is the time when a gal like me (single and staring 30 down like a mouse cornered by a puma) should be crying in her soy latte. That is if I drank soy latte, which I don't..because I'm too cheap...because I am Jewish. Unfortunately I am not one who believes in pity parties. I like to have a huge bitch fest, air all my grievances, and move on. This Valentine's Day, despite the lack of date, I will be going out and enjoying myself. I am actually thinking that I will probably enjoy myself more than the millions of women out there who assume that their man is planning something unbelievable for them only to cry themselves to sleep once that they discover he put no thought into the gift giving/valentines day enjoying process. At the very least, being single means you are never let down and damn that's nice. The only not nice thing is the lack of action I will be getting on V-day. That is of course if I can't find some suitable Joe at the bar. Oh did I tell you I am heading to the bar on V-day?? Yep, sure am. I think it is probably one of the top nights to celebrate being single by going out and meeting all the other singles at the bar. You never have to worry about a guy having a girlfriend or wife. And since they didn't spend any money on some chicks useless flowers, jewelry, or dinner they are more willing to pay for drinks, which for a cheap girl like me kicks ass!

Oh, I have to share with you this other fabulous tidbit from my life. I went all out and bought a droid phone. Shocking right?? No cable or Internet at home but I shell out major money for a smart phone. That's right.. I am now part of the 21st century and i got to tell you that it is kind of annoying. I can't tear myself away from sudoku, mahjong, and jewel lust on the phone. I literally can not put it down. These stupid games have a hold over me. See the beautiful picture below. I didn't take it but I now own that shiny bitch.

Very very funny

Only stunt meese were used in the making of the following video. Get ready to be in for the shock of your life. No, not really but it will make you chuckle, unless you are a heartless, soulless heathen.